I Finally Saw The Trees

I finally saw the trees. You may be wondering what I mean by that. Normally, when I am driving somewhere I never really pay attention to the scenery. I don't pay attention to the trees, buildings, bridges, or anything really. To be completely honest, and not many people know this, I count things. Yes, count. I count lines, tires on vehicles, sides to approaches, power line poles, and all kinds of things. I count.

I think the counting has helped me not get so caught up in my thinking. Counting has allowed me to get lost in counting and not think about all the things in my life that are occupying space in my head. I have counted for years and still do it quite regularly when I drive. I do however catch myself much sooner than I used to and I just notice the counting. I'm not really doing anything to stop it other than just noticing.

Today, I was driving back from Green Bay, Wisconsin and realized that as I was driving at times all I could see were trees. I saw trees and driveways and then houses that were set back in the trees. But as I drove along I noticed the houses were mostly covered by trees. For some reason, the trees stood out to me today. As I drove along I felt a sense of joy that I was in the moment and noticing the trees. I saw their shape, color, size, length, width, covered with lots of leaves, covered with not very many leaves, etc. They captivated me. They really really captivated me.

I was in pure awe of the trees. I thought to myself, "I have never noticed them before." I'm 36 years old and have finally seen the trees. They've been there all along, but I've never noticed them. They were so obviously there, but I couldn't see them.

What's important is when I drive I'm so focused on counting or whatever thoughts are occupying my mind that I never notice what is around me. But today, I saw them. I was present, in the moment, nowhere but where my feet were, and saw the trees.

See the trees. The only place you can be is where your feet are. The only moment that exists is right here and right now. Not 5 minutes ago, not 5 minutes from now. Not tomorrow and not yesterday.

One more thing before you go, and it bears repeating. We feel our thinking. Not our circumstances, not what's going on in the world. We only feel our thinking from moment to moment.

Until next time,

Jackson

Recovering anxious, worried, fearful, stressful, thinker